Disclaimer: The show and its characters belong to Paramount. The story below is mine, no profit being made.
Pairing: Tucker/Reed implied
Rating: G
Spoilers: The Expanse
Date: November 27, 2003
Archive: yes
Summary: Malcolm thinks of the changes to Trip and sees a need to act.

'I wish I knew how to reach my friend,' Malcolm thought, 'he is allowing hate and rage to seep deeply into his soul. Eventually there will be nothing left of him, no decency, no humanity, and I will have lost the man I consider my best friend.'

'The most significant tear in our friendship occurred when I attempted to urge Trip to honor his sister's memory...

***

"She's dead. So are seven million others. She was no more important than any of them," Trip.

"She was more important to you. There isn't anything wrong with admitting that," I pleaded.

"I'm gettin' reel tired of you tellin' me what I can and can't do. And while we're at it, I don't need you to remind me that Elizabeth was killed. So just let it alone!" Trip's voice shuddered. Trip starts to walk away and I attempted to follow, but Trip whirls around and says, "Mebbe you should pay more attention to upgrading your weapons so we can blow the hell out of these bastards when we find 'em!" Trip stalked off.

***

With that I suffered a wound to my heart, my best friend attacked me with words and virtually said the only thing I was good for was blowing things and people up.

Now I watch as the circles under his eyes get darker, his eyes grow distant with hate, anger and darkness taking over that face that used to light up with joy. I listen any time he speaks of the Xindi, of his rage and it echoes through me. Our friendship is starting to die, crumbling from the tremors of his rage. The solid ground it had seemed to be founded on being torn apart by the seismic waves of his hate, a magnitude 8 earthquake possible, one that would destroy all that we had managed to build between us.

Each day the tremors of his hate and anger shake me as he tears into my efforts to get the weapons working right, or by stating that we need to approach such a dangerous foe as the Xindi with caution. Soon there will be nothing left of him. Soon there will be nothing left of our friendship.

The only chance of saving him, his decency and humanity is to try to help him focus on what his sister would want him to be like. I know if he allows hate and rage to take over, he will never be able to heal from it. That it would be the last thing his sister would have wanted as he mentioned to me once that she loved his compassion. But to save him, I may have to sacrifice our friendship, and any possibility we may have had of more. It would be worth it though, worth the pain of losing his friendship to see him retain his humanity.

He will always carry scars from having his sister torn from him, but if he can move from rage and vengeance to determination he will get back to being Trip.

There is only one thing I can think of that may help him to do that. It is the one thing that may destroy our friendship too.

But it can not be put off any longer, I will act now and let the pieces fall where they may. The time for revolution is now, and I will do all I can to succeed even at the risk of death to the most important friendship of my life.